What the heck is this thing?!

Our library has labelled it Mystery. Which most likely means Fforde is typically a mystery writer. Because I can’t say there’s much of a mystery involved in this book, though there is a crime. I guess. Yet I can’t call it an alternate history either. Or science fiction. I would call it fantasy if I had to, but a fantasy reader would typically be disappointed by it. Then again, I can only assume a mystery reader would be completely confused!!

Then again again, I was completely confused!!

Just when you think you’ve got the world and the story figured out, it’d take a 90 or 180 degree turn. And not necessarily in a horizontal direction either. And to label it bizarre might make you think it was bizarre in a cool and interesting fashion. It’s not.

It’s just not.

So the premise? Okay, it’s 1985 for starters. Which normally wouldn’t be a problem for me, but it was just one more thing I had to keep reminding myself of. And it’s the UK. Erm, I think. Well, I guess not, really, since Wales is its own country. But, anyway, something resembling the UK. And it’s an alternate history, in that people are really obsessed with literature. By which is meant classic British literature for the most part, I think. Shakespeare is really big. And there are a couple of really cool points around this part of the premise. Shakespeare animatronic coin-op machines. The original manuscript of Jane Eyre being on display and a page turned every couple of days, so regulars can read it… verrry slowly. I liked that idea. It may even be true. And then there was a Rocky Horror Picture Show version of.. was it Richard III? Very big on audience participation.

So then to add to this premise, there’s a ChronoCorps, which does time travelly-fixy-uppy stuff. The main character’s Dad is one of those guys. And she ends up dabbling in it herself, of course. He tends to retroactively fit things into the time stream. So that bananas were genetically created and then planted back in the past. And things like that.

Do I need to even mention the blimps and the dodos? Probably not. Steampunk and alternative history readers won’t be at all phased by those. And, really, minor point. And nothing to do with anything.

And the bad guy is like immortal or a wizard or something I don’t even.

AND THEN! The main char’s uncle is a crackpot mad scientist, but the lovable sort, you know, and he invents something to let you go into books and change the story. And if you change the story on the original manuscript OHNOES!

 
If this all sounds awesome to you, more power to you, go ahead and read it. If you’re just confused, then, believe me, reading it won’t make you less confused.

Aside from all of that, the story was not, I believe, very well-written. I was halfway through the book and I felt like we were still at the setting-up-the-story phase. Sometimes there’s be odd bits of text that.. well, I thought the main char was also narrating part of it, but how could she know what was going on? She sort of guessed things she wasn’t there for. And then when it came to the big climax, I was confused. Granted my mind was also wandering because I was bored.

And then I can also quibble that in one chapter there were two misuses of the word ‘onto’. And then later on there was the reverse problem with ‘near by’.

As for the characters themselves, I felt the main character was pretty detached from her emotions. Colleagues are killed and she doesn’t seem to really feel anything. She has conversations with a man she claims to love, but they’re all very analytical conversations. She’s even pretty detached and third person narraty when she’s giving a report to her superiors about something that went down. I mean, narraty in a pseudo-literary sort of way, not a detailed-police-report kind of way.

Apparently there are more books about this main character, whose name is Thursday Next, which totally reminds me..

The names in here are stupid! And none more stupid than Jack Schitt.

Before I close, I probably shouldn’t neglect the Crimean War. Which is still going on. But I know nothing about the real Crimean War. Except there was one. So. Yea.

In summation, not the worst thing I’ve ever read, but possibly the most uneven hodgepodge thing I’ve ever read. And I will not be reading another thing about Thursday Next. And probably not another Jasper Fforde either.

For that reason, I wanted to like it. Alas, I did not.

The problems started right off, and while it did improve after that, its other problems became more obvious.

The basic plot is that two kids get transported to the past. Or another world. Just which it is is never clear. (Until you get to the afterward.) They get caught up in the local Celts’ battle with invading Romans.

In the beginning, I thought what the book needed was a good editor. So I was surprised to find the publisher was Bloomsbury. Do they not have editors at Bloomsbury?

The story starts en media res. (Did I spell that right?) Unfortunately, that is not always the best tack to take! We start with the boy, Dan, going through a mysterious mist. We learn through an almost immediate flashbacktracking that he’s chasing a girl in his class. They were on a class trip. So right there, I would’ve started the story on the class trip, so we get to see their normal environment and normal interactions with each other (if any). And then have this weird mist show up at the end of chapter one.

We then proceed to jump from his point of view to that of Ursula’s. And then for a number of chapters there is no dialogue. Another problem! At least for me. I think I need dialogue to keep me interested. Which is a definite benefit to first person — the whole story is a dialogue between the narrator and the reader. At any rate, once we do have people talking to each other, it gets better.

But it still has problems. There’s one paragraph that goes on for 3 pages. There’s another paragraph with 13 different names in it. And the tentative hold the author had on point of view and point of view shifts goes out the window. To mix my metaphors.

So that’s my opinion on the writing. As for the characters, they’re.. well, I was going to say they’re all right, they’re interesting. But no, actually, because Dan and Ursula are very passive. They’re swept up in things way too easily. Oh, you want me to kill people? Okay, if I have to. Oh, you want me to take an oath? Okay. Ursula figures out how to summon up the mist stuff. But does she use it to take them home? No. She decides that to help fight a Roman legion, you need… to drag in another Roman legion! What. The. Frell?

I did like that Ursula is mistaken for a boy, and then uses her newfound magic to make that rather more of a reality. And I do have a newish interest in British history. Unfortunately, those two aspects aren’t enough to overcome the other problems I had with the book.

One final comment I have is on Alavna. There’s this village that was pillaged and burned by the Romans. It’s called Alavna. The two kids and the people they’re with go check it out, knowing it’s been burned and whatnot, and decide to take Alavna into their hearts, or something, by naming themselves after it, and seeking revenge for it.

Which would be all fine and stuff if I had felt any emotional attachment to what happened at Alavna whatsoever. But I did not. I think it must have been described in very vague terms, with no clear visual, and done altogether too briefly for it to have any impact on me whatsoever. So I had trouble understanding why it had an impact on them.

To end with, I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t like this. And I could find little to redeem it either. I will not be seeking out more books by the rather mysterious N. M. Browne either.

Though I still feel an editor could’ve improved this greatly. That’s an editor’s job!