{"id":193,"date":"2002-04-13T01:40:27","date_gmt":"2002-04-13T06:40:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/2002\/04\/13\/\/"},"modified":"2005-10-22T15:10:01","modified_gmt":"2005-10-22T19:10:01","slug":"is-that-a-machete-in-your-pants","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/2002\/04\/13\/is-that-a-machete-in-your-pants\/","title":{"rendered":"Is that a machete in your pants?"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>\n

Idiots at the mall. Film at 11.<\/b><\/p>\n

I am currently in the market to purchase a very cheap DVD player which can play multiple regions. In other words, an Apex. The one I want is going for $120 on line, but there are tantalizing reports that it is available for much less in certain stores — notably CompUSA and Sears — if only you can find one that has<\/i> it.<\/p>\n

So today, after work (and after checking the mall near work), Okina and I headed out to shopping-land to do the round of stores there. When we were finished, we were at the mall, and as we hadn’t yet eaten, we decided to stop and have something at the food court.<\/p>\n

We sat down with our Sbarro and started to eat. I had earlier noted that the mall was absolutely packed with little kids — many many tarty looking 7th, 8th and 9th graders were milling around in groups. There were also some slightly older high school kids.<\/p>\n

At a certain point, Okina got up to go get a cover for part of his meal so he could bring it home. While he was gone, a very stoned sounding kid came over and sat down in his seat. I looked at him in surprise. He said “I’m gonna sit here now, ‘kay?” and turned to start talking to his friends. I began to object, but then Okina returned to the scene. It didn’t take the kid long to change his mind about sitting there and depart.<\/p>\n

But he didn’t part very far. He went over to talk to a gang of other kids who were sitting the next table over. We returned to eating as a group of teenage h0s with a baby joined the crowd.<\/p>\n

Then, suddenly, the kid and one of the girls were cursing at each other loudly. And then, apparently unable to express their rage with words, they began to fight. They were well into it, having knocked down a large metal signpost and attracted a large crowd of gawking junior high schoolers, when the police arrived. Or, I should say, one policeman. It was obvious that the mall knew the kids who came on the weekends would be rowdy — otherwise, they would have been happy with their rentacops. Instead, the real police were on the scene. Anyway, Mr. Middle-aged Policeman marched in and broke up the fight. He pulled the girl off of the boy and held them apart. Meanwhile, the girl with the baby began bitching out… someone. I couldn’t tell who it was, and Mr. MAP couldn’t either, because he told her to shut up. He resumed his lecture. I think he would probably have let them off with a warning, except the boy suddenly lost control of his one remaining braincell and tried something.<\/p>\n

The next thing we knew, the girl was gone and Mr. MAP and the boy were going at it. The cop shoved the boy up against the wall, slapped him a few times, and eventually wrestled him to the ground to put some cuffs on him. Meanwhile, another boy wandered into the scene and pulled a machete out of his pants. He<\/i>, however, had a neuron left to fire, because he quickly changed his mind, stuffed the (presumably fake) machete back into his pants, and slipped back into the crowd.<\/p>\n

More police arrived to disperse the crowd.<\/p>\n

We finished eating and left.<\/p>\n

The end.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Idiots at the mall. Film at 11. I am currently in the market to purchase a very cheap DVD player which can play multiple regions. In other words, an Apex. The one I want is going for $120 on line, but there are tantalizing reports that it is available for much less in certain stores […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[18,19],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/193"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=193"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/193\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=193"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=193"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flaminggeeks.com\/k\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=193"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}